Breaking free from discontentment
“No!” The cry burst forth as a mere whisper. Enough was enough. What was it that I truly desired? What was the elusive thing I sought? Would I even recognize it if it appeared before me, or had I become lost in the chase itself? Always in a hurry, perpetually running late, it felt as if I had been racing through an endless maze of life’s bureaucratic obstacles.
Perhaps it was the thrill of the chase, or the allure of money? Throughout history, people had traded their bodies, stolen children, and committed murder for a handful of credits. Who was I to think I was immune to the age-old pursuit of wealth? But deep down, I longed for something greater. Something almost divine, noble, and significant. Who was I kidding? What could possibly surpass the pursuit of money in the grand hierarchy of supremacy? The answer was relevance. Yes, that was what I craved. Just like everyone else, I needed to matter. In an ideal world, this would be of utmost importance — a world that cared about my seemingly inconsequential opinions.
The world had confined greatness to power, wealth, prestige, and status. It had narrowed down the definition to these four words. And in the relentless pursuit of greatness, families had been torn apart, lifelong friendships had withered away, and personal autonomy had been sacrificed, though it went unrecognized as such. Instead, it birthed an undesirable companion — discontentment — an insatiable hunger for more. By constantly rushing through life, I had inadvertently devalued those around me, rarely allowing myself the privilege of fully engaging and embracing the present.
Discontentment, the unwelcome visitor, gradually eroded away the years. At first, it slipped away unnoticed, with the precision only the devil possesses. Then, all at once, it devoured them. It welcomed me mockingly, unable to contain its delight at another conquest. Initially, I resisted, trying to convince myself that I was happy, content with what I had, who I was, and the people in my life. But slowly, I surrendered to discontentment. I embraced it. Moreover, it was easier to wallow in self-pity than to pretend that I had everything I ever wanted.
Life became a burdensome chore, a festering wound on my back. All that remained was the chase — the never-ending pursuit for more. Discontentment was not an unwelcome guest, despite what others believed. It was invited in, deliberately sought out by our inner negative drives. Everyone was driven by something — guilt, resentment, anger, or the insatiable need for approval. These drives conveniently masked themselves as discontentment, a more acceptable facade compared to their vulnerable underpinnings.
People driven by resentment or guilt clung to past hurts and mistakes, allowing their past to shape their future. They replayed their pain incessantly, perpetuating the past and stewing in their bitterness. Consequently, they immersed themselves in one project after another, using them as a twisted means to compensate for their failures or as a defense against reliving past mistakes. They believed that enough was never truly enough, and that there was always another conquest ahead that would finally provide the compensation they sought and silence their guilty, bitter selves. The weight of guilt could be merciless.
Materialism corrupted the mind, equating self-worth with net worth. Those desperate for approval pursued greater wealth in a frantic attempt to feel important and worthy. They yearned for acceptance. “Like me! Like me! If you do, maybe I’ll finally like myself,” they silently pleaded. They believed that by acquiring more, they would measure up to everyone else, impress their desired partners, and perhaps gain the acceptance and pride of their family. They aspired to become a force to be reckoned with, to wield influence. And I don’t just mean money here.
Some of us were slaves to our own beauty, constantly seeking physical alteration through cosmetic procedures, forever dependent on makeup to present a desirable image. We engaged in periodic battles with landlords over rent payments, yet adorned ourselves with the latest watches, shoes, and designer clothes. We kept expensive bottles of champagne and whiskey in our kitchen cabinets. For some, a decent meal or a new shirt took a back seat to the allure of the latest technological gadget. We were all enslaved to something or someone — spouses, jobs, family, possessions, desired image, or unbridled ambition, to name a few.
But ultimately, it mattered little what clothes our idols wore; the true malady resided within our hearts. Let’s face it: if you can’t let go of something, you don’t own it — it owns you. Contentment was the equilibrium, the balance — a guardian against desires gone awry and immoral ambition. Let me be clear, I don’t condemn ambition. In fact, I hold it in high regard. Ambition, like competence, is attractive, even alluring. No one should be ashamed of ambition.
However, it is worth noting that achievements are eventually surpassed, but the hunger for more is insatiable. It’s a never-ending cycle that can consume us if we’re not careful. Contentment, on the other hand, allows us to find peace and fulfillment in the present moment. It doesn’t mean we stop striving or setting goals, but rather that we appreciate what we have while working towards what we desire.
To break free from the grip of discontentment, we must first recognize its presence in our lives. We need to acknowledge the negative drives that fuel our pursuit for more and examine the underlying emotions behind them. Are we seeking validation? Are we trying to fill a void? Are we driven by fear or a sense of inadequacy?
Once we’ve identified these underlying emotions, we can begin to address them. This may involve seeking therapy or counseling, practicing self-reflection and introspection, or cultivating a mindset of gratitude and contentment. It’s important to remember that contentment is not a passive acceptance of mediocrity, but an active choice to find joy and satisfaction in the present while working towards a better future.
Finding relevance and meaning in our lives goes beyond external achievements or societal expectations. It involves discovering our true passions, values, and purpose. It’s about aligning our actions with our core beliefs and being true to ourselves. When we live authentically and pursue what truly matters to us, we find a sense of fulfillment that surpasses material wealth or external recognition.
In the pursuit of relevance, let us not lose sight of the importance of human connections and relationships. True significance lies in the impact we have on others’ lives, the love and kindness we share, and the support we offer. It’s about being present for the people who matter to us and nurturing those connections.
Ultimately, the chase for greatness, power, and wealth can be an empty one if it’s not grounded in a deeper sense of purpose and contentment. It’s essential to reassess our priorities, redefine our measures of success, and cultivate a mindset that embraces the present moment while working towards a future that aligns with our values and passions.
So, let us strive for relevance, not in the pursuit of external validation or material wealth, but in the pursuit of authenticity, connection, and a life that truly reflects who we are and what we believe in.
